MOCK INTERVIEW WITH JUAN DAVID HERNANDEZ A LIVING LEGEND AMONG CITIZENS IN EL PAIS DE CAGUAS

WE MET in the sixties when he started a hobby as a bass player with other fellows that I have forgotten.. They used to rehearse in the beautiful porch of their rented house on
Georgetti St. Later, Juan David became a fine acoustic guitar player and singer, as time went by. Had two sisters. One had a child from Virgilio Colon, a former elementary school class mate, who later did a masters in Philosophy, in where else? Germany. The last time I saw/chat with Virgilio, at the UPR campus in Rio Stones, he was
bitching about the stupidity of his college students, unable to abstract, as so well expressed ten years before, by former teacher with political pedigree Felix Cordova Diaz, who had expressed with same words such handicap of Puertorican nationals.

Juan David was a chubby fellow with powerful voice, weird/quick sense of humor. He used to bring me home that chitty newspaper CLARIDAD, religiously, and I paid and enjoyed it.
Particularly the graphic artists Lorenzo Homar, Tufinho, and many others involved
in the struggle for independence, against the Vietnam War, Nixon, CIA and such during that decade or twenty years.. It does not matter now. The staff of CLARIDAD ARE A BUNCH of JERKS from top to bottom, disconnected from our issue: ENVIRONMENT/ECOLOGY.

Later in college, we spent some times together, mostly at lunch. It was some puerorican
restaurant, in a corner street in the beautiful city of Cayey, where we both graduated. Tomasa del Carmen Vazquez, the judge, was then our classmate and friend. At any rate, once while having lunch, Juan David who had somewhat of an apetite, ordered some desert for gluttons. It is vanilla ' i scream' jaha bilingual laugh, with flan or top or the other way around.

Which reminds me, in English there are 3 ways to say one thing: inside out, backwards and upside down.. In Spanish we use "al verres" or ' al reves,' you pick. This is one of the few situations in which my native beats English.

Back to the studio, since Juan ordered the mentioned dessert, everyone around the table requested a nip, including Raulo Singala, whose mother was the worst Spanish teacher I ever had. His brothers became dentists and about him there is nothing I know. The solution? Juan performed some act similar to listening to a Hebbe
speaking that language from his throat.. A substance rather better not to be described now covered
the icecream/flan, that no one felt like sharing.

Hey what about the mock interview? Hollers, screams, figuratively, imaginatively some dark, obscure fans...

JUAN DAVID: I have read most of your hundred posts in endemismotrasnochado, what the hell is your intention?

KEYBOARD OPERATOR: Not much. I believe it is my responsibility to denounce and be critical. My teachers in elementary school, my parents, priests, other relatives were critical of yours truly.
It is a skill taught with fists, bitter, cruel words that many people go through in their childhood, life without realizing it. I was fortunate. I am able to focus and use the skill in the
blogosphere.

JUAN DAVID: I see. It is sort of a revenge against society, for the unjust pain inflicted?

KEYBOARD OPERATOR: To be honest, as anyone could be facing such an inquiry, I do not
give a flying fart about society, their leaders, or any authority. That was another collateral
skill from the brutality of the criticism. I am here. I have survived without any danger to myself or to others, except perhaps, my tendency to be brainy when others succumb to sentimentality, nationalism, clannish puerorican behavior.

JUAN DAVID: Changing quickly the subject, do you remember the infinitely brief moments
when we got together to play Cuban sones and sing rather sober?

KEYBOARD OPERATOR: Well Juan, before I get there let me tell you that during the last two decades I have taken the time and effort to visit you at your office in CITY HALL, every time I had the chance. You fucking ass hole never had the interest/courtesy/reciprocal attitude to send an email. Does that help you get a drift?

JUAN DAVID: Sure. That is my nature, indifference.

KEYBOARD OPERATOR: Fine Juan, we all carry our cross. But before I get there, I remember you married an ugly witch, with the exact same features of Olive Oil, Popeyes girlfriend, remember her?

JUANDAVID: Sure I impregnated her sometimes, we got divorced and she became a lawyer.

KEYBOARDOPERATOR: BACK TO THE FUTURE, well JUAN, I do remember playing the bongos when I was a little rough, and the conga drums in my backyard in SAVARONA.
I probably had some drinks of beer while you refused. But I tell you one thing, you really
had the talent with the singing/the guitar, and I miss those times that will never return,
since you are unable to send an email.
At any rate, could you end this interview with your opinion as the HISTORIOGRAPHER OF
EL PAIS DE CAGUAS, about this humble blog, endemismotrasnochado?

JUANDAVID: OBVIATING the evident rough, really rough edges of your writing, following
grammar rules, and everything in that bag, your blog is cool. Apparently, as far as I know,
the only one with the spheres to cover all that COURT. As irrelevant it may seem, I can tell from my view that eventually this blog could be used as a resource for research.

The environment, ecology, landscape management practices from the customer perspective
the illiterate employee, or the owner enjoying the profits from the destruction of our surroundings. The bored academicians jumping in the bandwagon for protagonic show. The happy plant collector, propagator...Enjoying the beauty, the smell, the growth of the effort.
This blog cover all bases. For further info...

Juan David Hernandez, HISTORIAN el pais de CAGUAS

Willie Miranda, wmiranda@caguas.gov.pr
Josefo Virtual, jvirtual@caguas.gov.pr